Building community in a changing world

September 1, 2020

People on the Verge

We’ve got a free year’s worth of Apple TV streaming – so we’re watching “The Morning Show” right now. Fantastic show. Reminds me of “The West Wing,” except it’s set on the set of a network morning television show. Anyway, the episode last night involved a scene where Reese Witherspoon’s character tells Mark Duplass that she can go into Jennifer Anniston’s trailer to calm her down because she has a lot of experience with “people on the verge.”

It got me thinking how so many of us are on the verge – what with the pandemic, the election, you name it. So we’re all getting a lot of experience – including being on the verge ourselves. And in my experience, if someone is on the verge, the best thing you can do for them is what Reese did – just be there for them physically, hold them, invite them to just breathe. It’s not the time for unsolicited advice, for much talking, for doing anything that doesn’t “feel right.”

It’s the equivalent of letting them “take a moment” or “take a beat.” And they may well need that “moment” to last days, weeks or months. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do but just to be there to and provide unconditional support. You’re not there to be the person that helps “fix” them. You leave that to others, whether they be professionals or other people in their lives. At that point, your loved one just needs someone to be in their corner, no matter what the circumstances. But I’m not an expert – so I’m open to your suggestions or recommendations on this (or any) topic…