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I love the teachings of Dr. Kweethai Neill, a hypnotherapist who integrates energy medicine into her practice. In a recent talk – at the 9:35 mark – she discusses how changing how you feel can change your life. How you feel, not how you think. She notes how the most common fear is that we’re not good enough. Not lovable. So that if you change your mindset so that are comfortable with yourself – “I am what I am” – that fear can dissipate. “You may not like me, that’s okay. I like me.”

It’s the principle of whether you like something – or don’t like something – your feelings about that something doesn’t change that thing. Apply that principle to yourself. The minute you withdraw your attachment to whether someone likes you, it loses its power over you.

The best part of my last job is that I worked from home for over 17 years. I spent much more time with my kids while they grew up than I otherwise would have. I spared myself the hassle of a commute. But I also was freed from office gossip. This “Time” article claims that some gossip can be good – and that may be true – but I’ve found it mostly to be damaging because of its negative nature. It’s hard to be a positive person when you get in the habit of listening to – and speaking of – cynical & jaundiced commentary. As someone who has blogged for 18 years, I’ve been forced to detach myself from the opinions of others because I put myself “out there” every time I blog. I’m occasionally surprised about how I can blog something that I believe is completely innocuous – yet someone reads it differently than I intended. I take a deep breath and remember it’s not me – I’m pretty careful about what I write – it’s their world view and that’s okay.

Of course, I’m still human and my feelings get hurt every day, just like anyone else. I just try to take a step back when that happens and inquire whether it’s worth me reacting – or “overreacting” – to what transpired. The answer often is “no.” And for good reason. Your opinion of me is none of my business.